This is one of my personal favourites, possibly because it has a beginning, middle and end, or maybe because I wrote it from the perspective of a boy which I do very rarely.
I wrote it in January, almost a whole year ago now, which I find it difficult to believe. It's one of my longer ones so hang on in there and give it a chance.
It's called White Roses, and did I already mention I love it? :D
Merry Christmas
I sighed as I lost yet another life on my game. Amy didn’t understand how her being in the room, her breathing, was putting me off.
“Were you even listening?” She asked in an irritating tone. Sometimes I could just kill my little sister. “I said, he gave me a white rose-”
“Amy I’m going to stop you right there.” I paused my game and turned to face her. “To be honest I don’t care, okay?”
Hurt flashed across her eyes before she took charge of herself. “Fine, I’m sure Sarah will listen to me.”
“I’m sure she will,” I muttered under my breath. Sarah was Amy’s best friend and almost as much of a pain as she was.
I returned to my game as soon as the door closed behind her. I was on level twenty-six, a record even for my standard. Just wait until the guys see this, I thought to myself smugly.
“Uh hello, I’m right here.” Jared said waving at me.
“God Jared, do you have to do that? It’s really annoying.” I couldn’t decide what was more annoying, his ability to float through walls, his mind-reading, or his being able to put thoughts straight into my head.
“Well as soon as I heard you were getting the high score I just had to come and see for myself, you used to suck at this game.”
“Let’s just say I’ve had a lot of spare time on my hands.”
“Yeah, okay whatever.”
He glided over to me, feet never really touching the floor. I sighed and remembered a time, not too long ago, that this would be my idea of the perfect Saturday. But this week my Saturday was going to be far from perfect.
You see Jared’s dead. That’s right - he died. But the worst part is, he won’t even tell me how it happened, it’s sort of a joke between us, a sick, sadistic joke maybe, but a joke all the same. His spirit likes to haut our town, he loves to creep out as many people as possible and do all the crazy things he missed out on in life, but mostly he just hovers around in my bedroom watching me play my games. Similarly to how he used to in life. No wait, scratch that, exactly like he used to in life.
“So,” Jared began. “You going to the big dance tonight?”
“No,” I groaned. We’d had this conversation a million times already. “I’m going to stay here.”
“Oh why? Come on, it’ll be fun! All our friends’ll be there, including wonderful me.”
“Oh great,” I muttered sarcastically.
“They’ll be girls.”
“Oh yeah I can just picture it now. ‘Hi I’m Lee and I speak to my dead best friend almost every day’.”
Jared laughed. “Well you won’t pick up any girls like that no you’re right.”
I sighed and looked into his murky eyes. “What do you want me to do?”
“Well . . . I’d really like it - I mean, if you don’t mind . . . could you –”
“God Jared don’t hurt yourself - spit it out.” I laughed.
“Well . . . I saw Tillie earlier.”
“What? Jared no . . . you didn’t? I told you not too. You should have seen her after you died.” I shook my head. “She’s still in a state about it-”
“I know, I know. But she was talking to herself, well, to me really, but she couldn’t see me, she didn’t know I was there.” His expression grew sad and lost. It was one of those few moments in life where I just knew that my friend needed comforting. I put my arm round him, but as a ghost he wasn’t really there, so I got a cold shock as my skin touched the air where Jared’s body should be. “She was asking me what she should wear.” He chuckled. “But apparently no amount of me pointing and shouting could convince her to wear the perfect sky blue one that she’d picked out to wear out to dinner with me before it happened.” He sighed and looked at me. “She told me how much she missed me, and how lonely she was. She wants someone to love her, but she doesn’t want anyone to replace me. She’s confused and scared, worried about what I think. What I think Lee. I tried to tell her, tried to let her know that I still loved her and want her to be happy. But she can’t see me, hear me, anything. But the worse thing is I know she wants to. She wants to hear me and see me. She needs it.”
“What? How unfair, I’m bloody stuck with you whether I like it or not.”
He smiled “Would you do me a favour? For Tillie?”
“Anything mate,” I vowed, somehow knowing.
“Could you take Tillie tonight?”
I took a deep breath and stared at him until I could possibly believe what he’d just asked me to do. I exhaled slowly and nodded. “Of course.”
He smiled. “Thank you Lee.”
*
I knocked on Tillie’s front door, foot tapping nervously on the ground. Jared was standing beside me, a longing in his eyes. His suit was exactly the same as mine; it appeared that you could get your hands on just about anything you wanted as a ghost.
I heard Tillie’s light footsteps rush down the stairs and fling open the front door.
She gasped as she saw me. “Lee?” She shook her head. “What, what, what are you doing here?”
“I’m taking you to the dance.” I smiled. “That is, if you’ll let me.”
Her eyes grew wider at my words and she just nodded. “Would you, uh, like to come in? I’ll be a few minutes.”
“Sure.” Both Jared and I entered her immaculate home. Her parents must be clean freaks. Jared stifled his laughter, forgetting I was the only one who’d hear him. “Where do you want me to put your rose?”
“My what?” She span round and her eyes focused on the white rose in my hands. The one both Jared and Amy had told me to get.
“Oh.” Tears appeared in her eyes and she had to turn away.
I jumped up at Jared’s nod and put my arm around her shoulder. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“That’s alright,” she sniffed. “It’s just . . .”
“Jared.” I summarized. “Yeah, I know.”
She nodded. “He used to buy me white roses all the time.” Her whispers only just carried to my ears. “I’ll be a minute, okay?”
“Okay,” I smiled. My smile, Jared had said earlier, could warm even a grieving girl’s heart.
“You’re doing fine.” Jared said. “She’s happy you can talk about me, she doesn’t really know how she’s supposed to feel.”
I nodded. “Okay, talking about you, easy.” I said as though making a mental list.
He chuckled.
Both our heads snapped round as we heard the delicate pat of Tillie’s flat shoes on the stairs.
She smiled at me as she emerged, but I couldn’t control the shock on my face.
She was wearing Jared’s dress, the sky blue one. It had straps on her upper arms, leaving her neck clear. It ran from shoulder to floor and showed off a figure I didn’t even know she had. Her fair blonde hair was tied up in a complex knot behind her head with a few strands falling down the side of her face. She smiled shyly and looked at me through her long dark lashes.
“Wow,” Jared breathed. “Say what I tell you.” He commanded.
Oh Tillie you look beautiful.
“Oh Tillie,” I breathed, no acting needed. “You look beautiful.”
She blushed. “Thanks. Jared always wanted to see me in this dress.”
And I can see why.
He chuckled mentally.
“So you ready then?” She asked, looking uncomfortable.
Tell her I love her.
Tillie noticed my body turn to ice.
“Everything alright?”
Tell her, Lee.
I took a deep breath. “Um, Tillie, this is going to sound insane, but . . .” I took another deep breath. “Jared wants me to tell you how beautiful you look, and just how much he loves you.”
“What?” She whispered, throat thick with tears.
“He misses you, but wants you to find someone to make you happy. That’s the only way he can be happy.” I looked into her eyes, which were sparkling with tears, the same colour as her dress. “And that’s if you are.”
Jared nodded and went to stand next to Tillie. “Thanks Lee.”
You’re welcome. Anything else? I added sarcastically.
He shook his head and stared deeply into Tillie’s eyes.
She seemed to sense his presence and shivered as he tried to sweep the strand of hair from her face.
I walked over to her slowly and did it for him.
“How, how, how do you know what Jared wants?” She sobbed.
“It’s okay,” I told her. “I warned you it’s insane. But Jared tells me things, things he needs people to know.”
A new set of tears welled up in her eyes and she threw her arms around my shoulders, she was incredibly warm and soft in my arms. I wasn’t too sure what to think.
“Lee,” Jared said from somewhere beside me. “I have another favour to ask of you.”
I let Tillie burry her head in my shoulder and soak my new suit with tears.
“Look after her . . . please.” He took a shuddery breath and I saw him fade a little. “I think it’s time I should be leaving.”
I nodded, unable to stop the stream of tears escaping from my eyes.
“Love her, like I did. Make her happy.”
“I will.” I promised out loud.
He smiled his famous mischievous grin before fading from my life forever.
*
I sighed and ran my hand over the rough grave stone, wiping some of the moss away.
“Honey.” Tillie placed the white rose into my hands and let me lay it silently over Jared’s grave.
I stood up and admired the old stone. It was strange how every visit made me feel closer to Jared, although I knew that was impossible.
The cold January wind bit at my cheeks and Tillie shivered.
“Come on,” I said, taking her hand. “I don’t think Jared’ll mind. It’s freezing.”
She giggled and wrapped her other hand around my neck.
I softly pressed my lips to hers and imagined what Jared would say if he could see this. But then I stopped myself because somewhere Jared could see this. I smiled at Tillie as we parted, her sky blue eyes shining brightly as always.
I sighed as we walked hand-in-hand from the graveyard.
Not for one minute did I think my promise to Jared would be a life-time one. I chuckled and shook my head. I connected with Tillie in a way that I couldn’t understand, and as I teenage boy, hadn’t known existed, until that fateful Saturday. I could finish her sentences, and her mine. We could laugh together, cry together, about Jared or otherwise. We’d been inseparable since the dance three years ago and I couldn’t imagine my life without her.
I still thought about Jared everyday and vowed to keep my promise.
He’d given me my life back.
My games console was where I left it before leaving for the dance with Jared. And it’s been collecting dust ever since.
